






Sandsville is home to several strip malls, warehouses, fast food chains - all of which are needlessly spread out
for maximum inconvenience. Take a look at all the marvelous places that the community has to offer!
Sandsville Academy (K-12):
The town’s small, dysfunctional school for kids of all ages. All of the characters go to school here. It’s run by an eccentric principal with his problematic pet chinchilla, Elvis. All of the kids love Elvis. All of the teachers want him dead.
“WORST school ever. Teachers are dumber than the students. The yard is just a pile of dirt. In fact, I became even stupider by going to school here. Plus, jail food is better.” -Kitty
Sandsville Aquatic Center:
A public pool - one of the few places in town that kids can go. The upside is that it’s free. The downside is the myriad of health problems you will likely get from swimming here.
“Gave me chlamydia from swimming in the rancid pool” -Clint
Dunkleman’s Department Store:
It’s the biggest big box store in all of Sandsville! It’s killed all of the competing small businesses with its cheap imported goods and underpaid teenage employees, so you have no choice but to shop here.
“Poor treatment of employees. My fascist supervisor, Josh, fired me just for raising awareness about unethical bathroom break rules. Josh, I hope you know you're on the wrong side of history. -Jenny



Flea's Fabulous Burger Baazar
A kid's restaurant arcade hybrid place. The mascot is Fernidad the talking Flea. Strategically placed next to Sandsville's Casino. Slightly unsanitary, but hey, the kids won't notice!
"Whatever you do, DON'T go into the ball pit." - Pia


Donut-O-Ritto
A fast food chain where donuts are stuffed inside of tortillas for some reason. Very popular amongst the kids. And amongst depressed adults seeking to take the pain away..
"Strawberry frosted donuts are technically considered a fruit." -Lucy
Ryan's Grand Old Buffet
A buffet style family restaurant that has been at war with the health department. Sandsville residents successfully protested for its re-opening.
"I found a hair in my mac n cheese and the guy at the front told me to "keep it to myself." I'd still come back for the soup fountain machine, though. Whoever thought of that is a genius! -Nils









